finally...

yeah!!!common...shout with me...YEAH!!!
i'm finally stepping down from the vice-president thingy...now i can be an average student..who don't have to think about to much problems...actually,i dont have to think about anything anymore!!!haha...freedom of peace and mind...i've forgotten already about that=p
anyway,my best wishes and congrats to adilah and prabu...OUR new president and it's vice...
may u guys triumph in your time of rules...this is your time now...mine and ivan had long gone and passed=p
but if u need our help,we'll be there...always!!just,not on the front seat anymore...we're just a plain student!!haha=p
so fun!!!

Truly,truly....

HAPPY NEW YEAR, 2009!!!

feeling down this week...got fever + flu + cough,cough,cough...huhu..in addition,also those ulcers...wuwu..very,very painful u know!!but then..even in all these pain i'm going through,someone manage to touch my heart..i'm meant figuratively,of course...

he cared about me so much that i felt touched and...happy.yes.happy.

last week,after going through all those mind boggling exams,he surprised me by showing up at nilai,to send me home...my home..at gombak..SURPRISE!!

anyway,i did not expect him to do that for me...to come all the way from ampang,then pick me up at nilai and drive me home...even mama was surprised he did that...i'm really,really touched...

then,during my worse days of sickness,should i emphasis on WORSE DAYS,he's still with me..nursing me..put aside the fact that he's a male nurse of course...he accompanied me to the clinic, made sure i get all the meals...made sure i ate the medicine on time...

i can honestly say,no guy have ever done like that,treat me that way...ever!

meeting this guy, getting to know him...i can surely say, that's the best thing that happened to me during 2008...apart from getting my license,or starting college and many more...

getting to know this one,particular guy...made my 2008, a memorable year..

cause he showed,taught,give,presented and many more that he did..that truly touched my heart...

now these is one of the friendship i'll treasure forever=)

How Could They...

How could my college gave my group only 1 day of christmas holiday while others get 5 days??
The reason they gave was we have exams on 24th and 26th...and it's unavoidable...
huh....Then on New Year's, i still have to come for junior registration...which is another holiday minus...but that one can be replace on any other day that i want..
How could friends stab behind my back when i helped then in their times of need?
But who am i to judge people...i can't even judge myself.haha
But i know what I could do...i could care less about them, i could break these rules and skip exams, i could even do things which is not myself.. But i know i wouldn't...
Because someone taught me, "it's better to do good with people then being trashed with, rather than be evil with others then being hated to"
hey..that's somehow true.=)

As time pass by..

As time pass by, things changes accordingly..
we can't hope that everything will stay the same forever..
some changes may turn out to our likeness but some may not..
but..that's what we have to do...to learn to adapt ourselves to new things...to changes..

things changes in my life lately...i'm not talking about a total trnabout...
but it's not as it's used to be before.. i've had conflicts..i've earned new friends..an lost some...
i've grew closer to some..and apart from others...but it's not like i planned all these to happen..
i don't..but that what i have to deal with...to learn to accept and adapt to changes...in my life..

these changes... in certain aspects,made me happier than before..because i'm nearly getting what i want..but to get that,i grew apart from my bestfriend..this change,i dont really like...
i know people say,friendship is important than things..

i'm torn between friendship..and relationship...i dare not make any decision..
i never really have the courage to make the decision in my life..
normally my family did it for me...and this time,my bestfrriend made it for me...
by growing apart from me...and i'll have to teach myself to accept that..and move on..

it's not like i can't always be there for my bestfriends..i'm always there....
it's just up to them either to see me as i am....or to see me as they want...
and i know, it's not the same munierah that we're talking about..

it's just not the same...

Creampuffs!!

It's been soooo long since the last time i did pastry with my sis....

Today, we did cream puff which is "sedap giler" okay!!!haha..

Actually, my sis was the one who makes it..i was the one who "supervise"..wakakaka

i was the tester, easily put.hehe..that's my favourite job!

anyway, this is how the process and the delicious cream puff looks like.

~ This is it before entering the OVEN ~

~ TADA!!! Transformed after exiting the oven ~

~ This is where they "lined up" before being baked ~

~ Hooray!! survived the heat as a team! ~

~ This is my creation! Haha. My sis was the round one.. ~

L.O.V.E

love hurts...so much...
it's either hurts you, or makes you hurts people..
that's why i'm not really a fan of love..

sometimes love takes you higher than the sky...
and sometimes it brings you lower than hell..

love makes us happy,makes us smile and laugh gaily..
love makes us cry for joy and happiness..also in sadness and sorrow...
love teaches us to share, to care...
it teaches us to dare, to dream...

love opens oppurtunities for us...
shows us the high and low, the up and down in life..

so why is it,that all of us are longing for love?
longing for this one specific particular feeling?
is it because we want to be love?
or we want to give love?

i also dont know which one is it...
because i'm afraid of love..
it hurt me onced...and made me hurt other people a lot of times already...

I dont hate love....i just have no reason to like it...

which one...

People say,we know when the time comes..
when enough is simply enough..
when to stop what we're doing..
when to give up..and follow the flow..
when to walk away from the game..
when to simply stop,give up,walk away...and let go...

but how do we really know,that's it's the right step..that's it's the right time

i've been searching for the signs..the right moment to stop..to give up and let go...
but i know i can't...somehow,i can't..because each time i felt like leaving,there's always something else that makes me wants to keep holding on...always..

but at certain times...when i realized the real,full truth in front of me,when i know i'm living in a world full of reality and not fantasy..i can't help but feeling i had enough...i suffered enough...my heart suffered enough...

but each time i think of leaving,of letting go...of forgetting you..
yoiu always did something that makes me forget about saying goodbye...you always did things that convinced me,leaving you is the wrong decision...that now is not the right time...that i still want a lot more with you...

but when i'm by myself...alone with my thoughts...i pity my heart...because it keeps on breaking everytime i think about you and her..and my tears will keep on coming for you...whether happy tears,or sad tears...but your actions..your words..the way you treat me..tells me that i shouldn't stop...shouldn't give up...tells me that i shouldn't let go..because if i did..i'll be letting go of you,of our memories..of everything we did all these while...if i let you go,i'll be saying goodbye to one of the most memorable thing that happened in my life...

right now..i'm confused...if i let go,i'll regret it everyday..for the rest of my life...
but if i don't..i have to prepare myself,my heart and my life...for two seperate ways..
either i'll find happiness and happy memories with you later on...
or..i'll be breaking my heart so bad that it'll be beyond repair...and lives in halucination and old memories...

both decision...i dare not make right now...